nihosika - discard / 没 [english translation]
僕の身体 何処にあるのかな
where has my body gone, i wonder
そこらに置いてきちゃったみたいでさ
it seems i left it somewhere around there
暗い道のど真ん中を
in the dead center of this dark street
ふらふらと歩いていく
i aimlessly stumble on
僕は死んじゃったのかな どうかな
i wonder, am i actually dead now
元々屍のようなもんだったけどさ
i've always felt like just a corpse, but
何故かあの頃の生活を
for some reason, when i think back to when i was alive
恋しく感じていたんだ
i feel a sense of yearning
もう戻りゃしないけどさ
but i'm not going back
幽霊らしく生きていたいな
i'd like to live on as a ghost
人間らしく生きられなかった分だけ
for as long as i couldn't live as a human being
安心を求めてさまよう僕は
i wander around, searching for peace of mind
まるで生前の私のよう
just like i did when i was alive
この夜の世界を見てみたいな
i'd like to try seeing this world of the night
あの世の世界を見てみたいな
i'd like to try seeing the world of the afterlife
宙に浮く体で 旅をしたい
i want to travel with my floating body
生まれ変わるまで 出先で楽しもうか
until i'm reborn, why not have fun out here?
...
またこの世界か
this world again?
another nihosika track! this is a song that i was absolutely obsessed with for a week or two there, and i knew i wanted to make a translation for it.
firstly, i will mention that there are two versions of this song. the one that gripped my brain for so long is not actually the official version, but rather the version labelled as "old" on the album. which is interesting, because it isn't put at the end of the album as a bonus track, but rather bewilderingly placed right in the middle of the tracklist, just a few songs after the normal version. i don't really understand it, but whatever. i did link the original version of the song at the top of the post, but the "old" version is certainly my preference.
i also wanted to note that the music video version of the song has no title on youtube. this does make it really obnoxious to try and search for on youtube, but it also reminds me of another one of my favorite japanese artists/utaite, x0o0x. maybe i'll translate some of their music, too...
anyway, some translation notes:
没
"discard"
not really a line, but the name of the song is for some reason translated as "discard" in english, where i think the kanji's meaning is more accurately "death" or "end." not sure why they translated it that way but i guess it's a bit more unique in any case
僕は死んじゃったのかな どうかな
i wonder, am i actually dead now
this line uses both かな and どうかな which both essentially mean "i wonder." i ended up translating one of them as "actually" since using the same phrase twice sounded too awkward, even if that was more accurate to the original line
人間らしく生きられなかった分だけ
for as long as i couldn't live as a human being
the phrase here "分だけ" means "to the extent of," so in the context of this line the literal translation is something along the lines of "to the extent that i was unable to live as a human, i will live as a ghost." i wasn't quite sure what they meant by this line to be honest, but i think "for as long as" probably is close enough
またこの世界か
this world again?
not really a translation note, but just commenting on how this line is dropped quickly right at the end of the song. some of the lyric sheets i found online didn't even seem to include this line at all interestingly enough, but it seems pretty important to the narrative of the song, lol